


she means everything to me

by Iittlesparkle



Series: girls like girls [2]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/F, First Dates, Friends to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-10
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-10-25 17:34:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17729693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iittlesparkle/pseuds/Iittlesparkle
Summary: @danihowell : should i ask my crush out for valentine’s daywhat happens when she does?





	she means everything to me

Fi just stops breathing for a second when she reads it. She doesn't know what she feels yet, because two very conflicting emotions are battling inside her guts. The first one, the annoying, optimistic one makes warmth flood through her whole body. The second one, the dark one she learned to adopt when things started to go wrong in her life, makes her want to throw up right there on her carpet.

_@danihowell : should i ask my crush out for valentine’s day_

She keeps staring at the tweet as if it's going to make it magically disappear. She wants it to disappear because for some reason, not knowing at all seems better than the possibility of Dani, of _her,_ loving someone else.

Maybe she should ask? Best friends definitely talk about crushes and all that stuff. But Fi never talked about crushes with her best friend for two main reasons: her best friend _is_ her crush and as a result, she doesn't want to know who her crush likes if it’s not her.

After spending a good minute starring, sat on her bed, she finally replies.

_@AmazingFi : Y E S (Also I’m offended you didn’t tell me you had a crush)_

She throws her phone at the other end of her bed as if the message stops existing if she can’t see it. She knows it’s not the end of the world if Danni likes someone else, there’s more important in life, but loves as its ways to make you feel as if nothing else matters.

She falls back on her mattress and tries to think of something else but all that goes through her head is Danni and all there is to love about her. She arrived in her life at the best moment, meaning at the worst time in Fi’s life. Her best friend, one of her only friends, passed away the year before and none of her friends could fill the void she left behind. No one until Danni, this girl who’s the same as her but also so different.

After a while the need to know takes over the anxiety and she reaches for her phone almost unconsciously.

Dani hasn’t replied to the tweet, but she has a new dm from her.

_Dani: if i tell you it would be two birds one stone_

She furrows her eyebrows in confusion. Sometimes Dani is a bit weird, but this just doesn’t make sense.

_Fi: wdym_

_Dani: fi please think i really don’t want to spell it out for you_

_Fi: Wow sorry I’m just a stupid bitch don’t use weird phrases on me_ _😬_

_Dani: It’s you Fi, you’re my crush_

Fi throws her phone away again. She read that wrong, she knows she has, and she doesn’t want to check because then she will know this is definitely not what she just read. She’s been crushing on Dani for two bloody years, it can’t be. When she takes her phone in hand again, she has two other dms.

_Dani: now please act like you’ve never seen this before i die of embarrassment._

_Dani: please don’t ignore me, i don’t want to ruin everything, that’s the last thing i ever wanted_

Fi can’t do that by text messages. That’s not how she imagined it and in that moment all she needs is to hear her voice, then she’ll know it’s real. She’s so scared to talk about it, about her feelings, but if Dani was courageous then she can be as well. She quickly scrolls through her contacts and call Dani.

“Hey?” Dani’s voice sounds small and Fi hates it, she doesn’t ever want to be the reason of Dani’s sadness.

“Hey, sorry if it’s weird but I didn’t want to have this conversation like that, I wanted to talk to you for real.” She says and immediately regrets how she expressed herself. Dani huffs an awkward laugh before replying.

“Wow if I wasn’t scared before I definitely am now, cut your shit and just tell me you don’t like me, I’m prepared.” The pain in her voice makes Fi hates herself for hiding her feelings all these years. Dani had been courageous enough to come out to Fi almost from the start, and even if Fi suspected she wasn’t straight either at that time, she hadn’t say anything. She knew Dani wouldn’t have judged her, but she was afraid her feelings would be way too obvious if she said anything.

“Shut up.” She said, tears already accumulating at the corner of her eyes, for some reason.

“Are you crying? Wow I didn’t know rejecting people was this painful.”

“Just, shut up Dani. I li-love you too. Always have.” She sobs, like the words were ripped out of her chest without her consent. It was such a relief, but at the same time the scariest thing she ever did.

“You’re serious? You always told me you were straight. Please stop crying I’m going to cry.” Dani says, her voice higher pitched than before.

“Yeah yeah I am serious. I was just scared, sorry I didn’t tell you.” She replied, gasping for air. She didn’t know why talking about this made her so emotional, but her tears were still all over her face.

“Now you shut up Fi, it’s ok to be scared I understand.” Fi could hear her crying through the phone as well. It’s ok to be scared? Maybe it is.

“We’re both dumbasses, aren’t we?” Fi laughs through her tears.

“Oh, that we sure are.” Dani replies in that cute giggle of hers. There’s a short silence on both lines as they try to calm down before Dani talks again.

“So, in that tweet I said I wanted to ask my crush out. So, now that the crush thing is out of the way, do you want to go on a date with me?” It feels so surreal to hear that from her that Fi has to pinch her arm to make sure it’s not another one of those really realistic dreams that make her cry when she wakes up. When she’s sure, she replies.                 

“Oh my god yes, where?”

“What’s your opinion on cat cafes?

-

“Cat cafes are bloody amazing.” Fi breathes after a few minutes at their tables. They ordered a hot chocolate each and there’s a cute little tortoiseshell cat sleeping on the chair next to them.

“I told you.” Dani smiles, her dimple popping out. She looks too damn good and if Fi wasn’t already head over heals for her she would probably fall in love on the spot. She tied her hair in a pony tail, her baby hair curling on the side of her face. She’s wearing mascara like always, darkening her brown eyes, and her lips are a little pink from that gloss she loves so much. She’s all in black, a skater style dress and some mildly high heels. She’s breath-taking.

“You’re supposed to look at the cats, not just me you know.” Dani teases, her eyes crinkling a bit.  

“Shut up, you’re pretty.” Being able to say that feels amazing. Also a bit scary, but that’s ok. She never even imagined it would happen.

“Not bad yourself.”

Their hot chocolate arrives and they both drink for a while before ditching them for good to explore the place. They want to see every cat, no matter how long it takes.

“Look there’s one here! He’s adorable I want to punch myself. Or something. I want someone to punch me.” Dani beams at a Siamese cat who’s walking towards them in a nonchalant way. Fi punches Dani.

“Ow!”

“You asked.”  

At some point during their little exploration, Fi notices the little rainbow flag stuck to one of the walls. She instantly feels safer. Being herself is scary, but maybe some places, and some people, aren’t as much.

Maybe that’s the reason why as they’re about to leave, she isn’t scared of taking Dani’s by the hand and planting a kiss on her lips. A soft, short one, but also the most important of all because it’s the first. It feels electrifying to do that, to kiss the girl she loves in front of other people, not to fear doing so.

“Wow Fi, what happened to you?” Dani says, eyes sparkling.

“I decided if you can be courageous maybe I can be as well.” She smiles, dragging Dani out of the café and preferably to her house.

 

**Author's Note:**

> i know phil is allergic to cats but i decided fem!phil isn't because i love cat cafes and it's like my dream to have a date in one  
> the cat cafe i described is actually one i go to quite often and it's like my safest place in the world 
> 
> share on [tumblr](https://iittlesparkle.tumblr.com/post/182710624982/she-means-everything-to-me)


End file.
